I went to Sahuarita Police Department today to talk about the Al incident. It's been 6 years. Wow. I can't believe I still even think about it. I think it's mostly because I've learned and read and done some self-healing this time. Yet, there are times when I still think of the time he did what he did. He ruined what I thought was a good relationship. He ruined everything he ever told me when trying to 'help' me out of some really dark times. I was alone, vulnerable, scared, and frightened about certain life aspects. He seemed to want to help. Genuinely help. He obviously had other intentions from the get-go. He got what he thought he wanted, I guess. Now we have nothing. What a lying, conniving, manipulative, and predatory man.
I have to go back next week. I guess the plan is to have a confrontation call with Al. It's scary to even think about. I haven't thought about what I would say to him if I ever spoke to him again.
Homework for me:
Look into chase statements for checks or anything that shows his company's name.
Look for the photo of his massage company card. Ask mom maybe? I think it was something like 'A Touch Above' or something like that. Something with 'touch' in the name.
Look for screenshots of texts, including images -- even the ones where I was naked to show my body for him to 'see what he was working with'/get a feel of my style, comfortability, etc.
I think what got me here is that I'm ready. I"m ready to move on. I'm ready to end that hurt-filled past and put it behind me where it should be. The situation stirs in my head and takes more space than I want it to. It's been too many years to have him haunt my peace.
The memories and flashbacks suck. They really do. I screamed a few times when I was back home after the interview. I am so mad at myself for a) not doing anything more before the incident b) flirting back with him c) not reading into the 'signs' cause there were plenty of them after years of it coming to the forefront when certain things would trigger the feeling/emotion/hurt/pain/agony/feeling of betrayal and deceit. I'm angry inside. I'm angry at him. I'm angry at myself. I want this anger to subside.
What worries me more is that he may be out there manipulating women into thinking that they're safe with him and around him, when in reality, he is slowly and mentally seducing them with all his 'skills' - massage included. He claimed to have several professions -- massage therapist, photographer, pest control company owner, 'handyman', great with yard work, and 'great to have around. That's another thing he'd say often to help reinforce my feeling of safety and comfortability around him. He would often say things like - "I'm great to have around. Angie doesn't know what she lost. If you were with me, you'd get a long, nice massage every day! You are beautiful. You're smart. You're so much more mature than you're age. You have beautiful skin.
I've listened to my recording twice now. Well, at least started it twice. Here's the third time. I haven't been able to finish it. I hope I can now that I'm making time to take notes.
Detective Montoya was the one assigned to it and he's no longer with the department. He was apologetic for it taking so long to get to this case. It was difficult to even start the conversation for me. Well, it sounds like I went right into it...I said his name immediately. I'm so glad that the detective asked questions because I was so worried about what to say and what mattered or would be relevant.
The detective was so great and made me feel comfortable and cared for from the beginning. Made the conversation feel like it was over due and wanted to hear any additional details that I may remember. Remembering was not easy, but I remembered more than I recalled before, so that was nice.
Angie's last name was Gutierrez before she remarried. Angie is Al's ex-wife who was in my graduating class in Rio Rico High School.
