Smooth Operator

 I'm listening to this while working. It came up because Josh just finished a webinar and jeff said that it went smooth. 

Anyway, it may be good to write anyway. I had a webinar yesterday. A Qualtrics webinar intro to Qualtrics/survey editor. I re-watched the beginning of the recording before we went to the movies last night. I wasn't too disappointed. I do know more about Qualtrics than I give myself credit for. I need to not be so tough on myself. I know that. Jacoby tells me that too. I have to treat myself with more compassion. SCFL as we say. Self-care for life!

I haven't spoken with him as much since Brian moved in. Maybe only twice? They say that the less you feel you need to see your therapist is a good sign that you're getting better. However, I don't want to push all that drama in my head onto Brian. It's not fair to him. It's really not his responsibility to make me feel better about myself and/or solve my problems. I mean, he does help with all of that A LOT! He's my safety blanket in so many ways. he protects me at all times. I feel safe with him around and I am so so happy that we're back together. I really am. I really really am. I love him and thank him for being who he is with me and around me. He really does understand me. 

Like Chuckie said to me as well as Natalie, "I know you better than you know yourself". They are right.  They do know me. They know who I am, who I want to be, and who I pretend to be. That's sad. Ouch. I guess that's why they're my friends. To keep me in check at times.